The Courage to Take a Stand

“Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced.”  – James Baldwin

Taking a stand can feel like walking around with a huge bullseye on your back. Women tend to avoid polarizing views because we want to be liked and accepted, so we avoid the really strong viewpoints that could alienate potential allies and hope for the best.

What’s the result?

You walk around with rage. Deep rage. Your spirit rages against you (and the world) because you’re not giving yourself the space and permission to be your truest, boldest self. You’re holding back from what you REALLY want to say and do, so of course you’re one unhappy camper.

It doesn’t have to be that way, though.

You can express your strong views. You can voice your opinions. You can take a stand even if it’s unpopular and controversial. You don’t have to sacrifice your Soul to be liked and accepted.

See, wanting to be popular is giving your power away. When you’re concerned with who likes you and who doesn’t, you’re basing your self-esteem and self-worth on external factors that can blindside you in the blink of an eye. Giving away your power tears you down because you trust other peoples’ opinions of you more than you trust your own opinion of yourself. How crazy is THAT?!

The courage to take a stand is the power of declaration. You declare who you are, what you believe, and why you’re here. You tap into the power of the Divine Feminine within you, the Goddess within you, and you step into your role as a Queen.

A Queen is confident in herself. A queen remains steadfast in the face of unpopularity and controversy. A Queen trusts her instincts and has a supporting posse to prop her up when she needs it. A Queen loves herself, is bold, and demands excellence from herself or others.

You, my sugar plum, are a Queen. Put on your crown.

Now, I’m not saying be controversial because you can. I’m saying voice your truth and set yourself free to follow the path that’s right for you. I’m saying trust your gut more than popular opinion. I’m saying surround yourself with the people who tell you the truth and want the best for you.

Can you relate?

You may have to take a stand many times a day. You may have to make big, big decisions that make you quake in your boots. You may hesitate to be that bold, that uncensored, that powerful.

Let me ask you this: What else are you here to do? How much longer will you keep biting your tongue and being untrue to yourself? Aren’t you tired of hurting yourself that way?

Taking a stand is about taking back your power. It’s about standing up for yourself and your thoughts, opinions, needs, wants, desires, and dreams. It’s about feeling so grounded in yourself that you don’t need anyone else’s approval of you to feel good about yourself. It’s about taking yourself seriously enough to play a bigger game (remember that?) and not backing down even when there’s pushback from your circle.

Are you with me?

When you take a stand, you send a clear message to the Universe: you’re here, you’re being true to yourself, and you’re not afraid to take up space. Look out, world!

You also send a clear message to the people who interact with you and show them what you will and will not accept. You don’t have to be nasty to be respected and remember that anyone who throws that at you is insecure in the face of your power. Don’t let the haters grind you down; straighten your back and keep doing your thing!

Explore these 5 ways you can take a stand and take back your power:

Keep a daily journal.

Journaling is a powerful way to tease out who you are and what you’re about, and it’s a great reminder of your uniqueness on the days you feel blah and uninspired.

Write down your opinions on world events, fashion, sexuality, travel, business, media, spirituality, and whatever else strikes your fancy. Doing this often enough keeps you in tune with your truths and beliefs, and helps you separate fact from fiction when the gremlins come calling.

Knowing who you are grounds you in yourself and amps up your confidence−you’re less likely to be confused by external pressures to sabotage yourself by denying your truths and desires. You’ll also become savvy at spotting foolishness a mile away and not falling prey to it. Woot!

Consult your coterie.

You’ve got a power posse of your own, right? Women who love you, have your back, and call you out on your excuses are invaluable to your growth and evolution. They’ll put the wind beneath your wings when you feel like a broken bird, and they’ll spark your fire when the flames go out.

Call on these women as you reclaim your power. Let them know when you’re struggling, soaring high, and making miracles happen. They’ll help keep you on track and back you up when you have a HUGE task before you.

3 cheers for our sisters and girlfriends!

Transform your fear into fuel for growth.

Taking a stand can be super scary. Sometimes you’ll feel like hiding under the covers with a tub of Ben and Jerry’s because it just feels. too. hard.

Newsflash: hard doesn’t equal impossible.

If you’re challenged by something, acknowledge it, and figure out how it can launch you forward. What do you need? Time? Money? Energy? Support?

When you answer these questions one by one, you start to see glimmers of possibility and act on them. You find that you do have the stamina to keep going, and you do have what it takes to succeed. If you don’t already have it, you can get it; take a deep breath and make the leap, baby. Yes, you can.

Take supreme care of yourself.

Eat your veggies. Hydrate. Sleep. Spend quality time with your peeps. Move your body. Have more great sex. Love up on yourself and check the judgment at the door. 

Permission to love and accept yourself as you are is a powerful thing. Realize that you are worthy, beautiful, and enough just as you are. Give yourself the gift of being in your own corner and watch your Soul unfurl into full bloom.

Can I get a witness?

Admit your dreams and act on them.

You have at least one big dream in your Soul. What is it, and will you let yourself pursue it?

We’re often our own biggest obstacles, so make sure you’re not filling your head with excuses why your dream can’t work (see #3).

What’s calling you forward? What’s your deepest desire? What would you give anything to make a reality in your life?

Answer these questions in your journal (see how handy it is?) and jot down what you’d need to make your answers tangible. Breaking it down into bite-sized chunks keeps you from overwhelm and lets you pivot when you need to. Give yourself the freedom to tweak as you go along so you don’t get stuck in quicksand and fizzle out.

Taking a stand is a powerful way to live your life. The courage to take a stand elevates you to a class of one and brings your strengths to the fore. Sexy!

This is your time to step your game up. Are you willing?