"Overgiving Isn’t Generosity—It’s Self-Sabotage"

There’s a toxic myth in business—and especially among entrepreneurs: “The more you give, the better you are.” It sounds noble, but it’s nonsense. Overgiving isn’t a virtue. It’s not generosity. It’s self-sabotage, plain and simple. And if you’re constantly overextending yourself in the name of “serving your clients,” you’re not helping anyone—you’re hurting everyone, including yourself.

The truth is, overgiving doesn’t build loyalty or admiration. It builds resentment, burnout, and an unsustainable business model that will collapse under the weight of your self-sacrifice.

The Lie of Overgiving

We’ve all been sold the idea that going above and beyond is the key to success. More revisions. Longer hours. Endless “extras” thrown in for free. Overdelivering has been marketed as the secret sauce of great entrepreneurs.

But here’s the harsh reality: Overgiving is a form of self-neglect disguised as service. It’s what happens when you undervalue yourself so much that you think you need to do more—always more—to justify your worth.

This mindset is dangerous. Overgiving leads to clients who take advantage of your lack of boundaries, a constant sense of overwhelm, and the inability to scale your business because you’re too busy running yourself ragged.

The Cost of Overgiving

Let’s break down what overgiving actually costs you:

1. Your Energy. When you’re constantly going above and beyond, you’re burning yourself out. And burnout doesn’t just impact you—it impacts the quality of work you deliver. Your clients don’t get the best of you; they get what’s left of you.

2. Your Time. Every extra hour spent overdelivering is an hour you could have spent growing your business, improving your skills, or, heaven forbid, resting.

3. Your Value. Overgiving doesn’t make clients respect you more. It makes them respect you less. When you give away your time and expertise for free, you devalue your work—and yourself.

4. Your Business Growth. Overgiving is a bottleneck. It traps you in a cycle of doing too much for too little, leaving no time or energy to scale.

Generosity vs. Overgiving

Let’s get one thing straight: Generosity is not the problem. True generosity is intentional and sustainable. It’s a thoughtful decision to provide extra value in a way that benefits both you and your clients.

Overgiving, on the other hand, is compulsive. It comes from fear—fear that your clients will leave, fear that you’re not enough, fear that you have to earn your worth through constant sacrifice.

Generosity creates boundaries; overgiving obliterates them. Generosity builds trust; overgiving breeds resentment. The difference is whether you’re giving from a place of abundance or depletion.

Why Overgiving Fails Your Clients

Here’s the irony: Overgiving doesn’t even serve the people you think you’re helping.

• Clients Don’t Value What’s Free. When you overdeliver, especially for free, your clients don’t see it as a generous act—they see it as the norm. It sets unrealistic expectations and trains them to expect more for less.

• You Can’t Show Up Fully. Burned-out entrepreneurs don’t deliver their best work. Your clients end up with subpar service because you’re too exhausted to perform at your peak.

• Boundaries Build Trust. Contrary to what you might think, clients respect boundaries. They trust professionals who value their time and expertise enough to set limits.

How to Break Free from Overgiving

If you’re ready to stop sabotaging yourself, here’s how to shift from overgiving to sustainable generosity:

1. Recognize the Patterns. Acknowledge where you’re overgiving. Are you constantly saying yes to “just one more revision”? Throwing in extras without charging for them? Start paying attention to the patterns.

2. Set Clear Boundaries. Decide what’s included in your services and communicate that upfront. Extra work should come at an extra cost.

3. Charge What You’re Worth. Overgiving often comes from undercharging. When your prices reflect your value, you don’t feel the need to overcompensate.

4. Learn to Say No. Saying no isn’t selfish—it’s necessary. When you say no to what doesn’t serve you, you create space to say yes to what does.

5. Prioritize Yourself. A business that drains you is a business that will fail. Invest in your well-being, take time to recharge, and remember: You can’t pour from an empty cup.

Share Your Overgiving Story

Are you guilty of overgiving? What’s one way you’ve been sabotaging yourself in the name of generosity?

Here’s your challenge:

1. Identify one area in your business where you’re overgiving. Is it time, expertise, or energy?

2. Decide on one action you’ll take this week to set boundaries and protect your value.

3. Share your story in the comments. How has overgiving impacted you, and how are you breaking free?

Let’s start a conversation about building businesses that thrive—not through sacrifice, but through sustainable, intentional generosity. Overgiving isn’t noble—it’s toxic. Let’s leave it behind and create a model that serves everyone—starting with ourselves.